Monday, March 22, 2010

TMI Tuesday....





A Mr. Richard Fader from Ft. Lee New Jersey asks....

"Dear Mr. Knowitall, Where have all the philosophers gone?"
In your opinion, what are some of the most complex mysteries confronting us today"?

Dear Richard, "What is the meaning of life"? Has nothing on these conundrums...


* Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
* If a lawyer can be disbarred, and a clergyman defrocked... Can electricians be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, and tree surgeons disembarked?
* When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
* Why is brassiere singular, and panties plural?
* Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor, but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?
* If a word is misspelled in a dictionary, how would we know?
* Why is it that writers write, but grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham?
* Why do 'slow down', and 'slow up', mean the same thing?
* Why doesn't onomatopoeia sound like what it is?
* Why do 'fat chance', and 'slim chance' mean the same thing?
* If humans evolved from monkeys and apes..Why do we still have monkeys and apes?
* How can weather be 'Hot as Hell' one day..And 'Cold as Hell' another?
* Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
* Why don't you ever see this headline.."Psychic Wins Lottery"???
* Why is it called lipstick, if you can still move your lips?
* When you 'Lose your Temper', shouldn't that mean you get happy?
* If someone is deceased, did they just come back from the dead?
* How do you get off a non-stop flight?
* If Blind people wear dark glasses, why don't deaf people wear ear muffs?


See Richard...Important questions are still being debated!
Good Question...Thanks.
Mr. Knowitall grows weary from all that important thinking...
See you tomorrow...
Peace...!!!

22 comments:

Serena said...

Most baffling conumdrums, oh Wise One. Makes me glad I'm not a philosopher. How much do they make, anyway?;)

lime said...

those are indeed a perplexing set of questions!

Leah said...

Awesome, I love coming to your blog, always something good to read!

S said...

You!
Yes, in fact, I have been busy. It's frightening how much time blogging once took up in my life.

Miss you, though. Should you need some bloomers or help with the trash you know where to go!

Greg S. said...

You know those containers that keep hot food hot and cold foods cold? How do they know the difference?

chitowngreg
http://chitowngreg.wordpress.com

Mona said...

Galen, I am NOT reading your blog! :(

A Daft Scots Lass said...

Love this post.Something different.

the walking man said...

O philosopher of the ages, sage of the days gone by and coming now you have posed all of the mysteries of life and are consigned to spend the rest of your days answering them.





(in exactly 55 words)

Mona said...

Not "Mysteries" Walking Man, "Miseries"! :D

Mona said...

NOW I know why Galen did not answer the 55ves. I must be a shrewd B*...

Evalinn said...

Lol, where do you get all this stuff from? I really liked the non-stop-flight thing. I´ll try and figure out on my next trip! ;-)

Shrinky said...

I'm just of to lie down in a darkened room to think about all this..

Jessie said...

lol ...G-Man you're hysterical!! there are a lot of people trying to learn the English language that would ask the same thing!

Nessa said...

i must go to the potty room to think.

Tales on Tuesday - Lost in Space

The Turning Point said...

Philosopher. I've heard they are nothing but stand-up bullsh*ters. Still too many of them around.

Jim

buffalodick said...

I'm still wondering about the word "unthaw"...

secret agent woman said...

I'll take a stab at one of them: How can weather be 'Hot as Hell' one day..And 'Cold as Hell' another? Because hell is imagined, it is whatever state would make you most miserable at that moment. See, there are still philosophers around.

Reverend Michael Kilgore said...

Well, great! Now I won't be able to fall asleep at work today....thanks G....

Glue must be exposed to air and dry in order to bond......

One Prayer Girl said...

What interesting and important questions you pose. Where are the answers? I really wonder about publishers and chapter 11. :)

Now - unrelated to your post.

CASE OPENED AGAIN!

I no longer think in only black and white. I think in thousands, maybe millions of shades of gray too. So -
if I saw someone about to step into the path of a speeding truck, you can be certain I would warn them, maybe even lay down my life for them.

PG

clean and crazy said...

he,he,he,he thanks, i needed that. and thanks for everything else too

Jinksy said...

I love your way of thinking with these questions, but would probably love some of your answers even more! LOL :)

Nishant said...

those are indeed a perplexing set of questions!
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